Jun 20

Snoop!

According to the OED, “snoop” comes from a Dutch word that means “to consume dainties in a clandestine manner.” Go forth and utilize this nugget.

May 08

2006 Baltimore Kinetic Sculpture Race Movies

A vast improvement over last year’s drenching! See KineticBaltimore.com for photos, write-ups, commentary and awards. The 2005 movies illustrate precisely the sort of doom and damp which we do not endorse.


My very favorite sculpture, the Platypus powerhouse shifts into four-wheel drive to chug steadily out of the water. Not content merely to have a wicked cool sculpture whose engineering is art in itself, the Platypus returned this year sporting a platypus so impressive that it could have been its own sculpture. Quicktime movie, 18MB, 30 seconds


The Platypus churns up Key Highway, pausing to shift the gears of their Suzuki Samari transmission, and daintily topples a cone when their lane becomes insufficiently wide. The lighter two-headed dragon flies up behind. Quicktime movie, 18MB, 29 seconds


A dapper pilot pops out of the squid-covered KinetiNautilus as it zips up Key Highway, passing the Frog. The Rat is next in line to leap past the leisurely amphibian. Quicktime movie, 16MB, 25 seconds


On our way to the water entry, we passed the spinning Hillbilly House, Suessmobile and Fifi cycling through downtown Baltimore. The effect as we accelerate away from them is quite fun. Quicktime movie, 13MB, 21 seconds


The Hillbilly House spins by and we play tag with the Seussmobile, pipes and bouncing limbs a go-go. Thing 1 graces us with a furry salute as we jet off toward the water entry. Quicktime movie, 19MB, 30 seconds


The overly-complacent crowd breaks and runs as Bumpo the elephant careens out of the mud with unexpected speed. Quicktime movie, 9MB, 14 seconds

Jul 27

Elvira’s Lament

If I were an overweight feline,
The first thing that I’d go and do
Is to eat all my food in a jiffy,
And then, I would come whine at you.

I would claim that I had never eaten.
At least, not in recent years!
I’d howl and moan in a hungerous tone,
Crying giant wet starving cat tears!
– to the tune of “Time a Bottle” by Jim Croce